Temporary Lay Off

It has been done before. There are too many things flying at you and you put your hands up in halt. You don’t surrender because you are weak or scared–you surrender because you are just plain ol’ tired. That is me. I am there.

About once per year I take a mandatory break from social media. It is a life necessity. To be quite honest, I can’t take too much of the smiling faces and “hey I did it” posts knowing that every day life just isn’t made that way. Sure, you can smile 95% of the time but is there not a 5% when smiling just isn’t an option??? What about that side of things?

Aside from the validation posts (so guilty of that) disguised as good news sharing or thoughtful insights, there are all of the opinions. For me, it is just too much. I have hidden behind social media plenty of times before. I have pretended to be happy when I knew damn well I was far from it. I have dumped my feelings out into cyber space because I just did not have a clue what else to do. But sometimes, just sometimes, you gotta lay off–downsize.

Being laid off sucks (been there…twice), but when a company does it for the right reasons it is to restructure, rebuild, rework, reorganize…it isn’t to hurt those who have been let go. Not that Instagram or Facebook would be hurt by my disappearance, but it is time to restructure, rebuild, and reorganize my life.

No one needs to know I ran 700 miles or saw an $8 loaf of bread or volunteered at a handicapped dog shelter or saved a dolphin from a burning building. No one needs to know my life–especially those who I haven’t seen since the 5th grade. Yes, I currently do pen–err–type a bunch of words on a blank page, and yes most of those words are strung together to resemble some sort of snapshot of my brain (and life), but isn’t that different? Perhaps it isn’t. Perhaps this is just the long drawn out version of shorter social media posts. Either way it is typed, I am laying off social media for now. Breathing room is essential…


Freestyle Friday: Love Shack

I used to turn this song up loud and wig out with the kids snug in their car seats wigging out too. I heard it on the radio yesterday afternoon and I was instantly happy and bouncing along. If this song doesn’t make you lose a little control and let loose then we must revisit your idea of freestyle.

The Incredible Invisible Woman

By nature or by bullies (both have affected the outcome I suppose), I am a background kinda girl. Running for president or making speeches is really not my thing. Working on a lay out or typing up memos is more my lane. And while I am okay with the introvert part of self, it still kind of hurts a bit to be…looked over.

Over the past few days I have been doing some research on self and  made it a point to sit back and watch how others reacted to me. Most things I should not be offended by, however, these past few days I found myself to be most offended.

I found people ignoring me, bumping into me, talking over me, and cutting me off. I felt….invisible.

I prefer the background, letting my genius shine through, however, I do not particularly appreciate being invisible. It just doesn’t feel good. I am not overly distraught about it…like I didn’t lay in my bed and cry about it or anything, but there was a twinge of sadness on the outskirts of my emotions. I don’t want to be invisible.

There are no plans to become un-invisible. Usually this is the point when I hatch some sort of life changing plan and sink my teeth into a book about being extraordinary, but….not this time. This time I am just going to recognize my invisibility, shrug at those who choose not to see me or those who can’t help but not to, and move forward. Where I am meant to be is where I am meant to be. What I am meant to see I am meant to see. And when I am meant to be seen I will be. I am okay with that–I get to actually be that proverbial fly on the wall which could be beneficial in more ways than one.